It is my birthday today and as I enter this new year, I feel more soft, whole, radiant and embodied than I ever have before. I feel more at home within myself, with a stronger feeling of grounding and inner peace. Much of the inner war that I fought within myself through my 20’s and 30’s has subsided. And while old patterns still rise within me frequently, I am wise in how to navigate them. I now know that I can consciously choose to pull them out like weeds and replace them with new loving seeds of support.
What I am feeling within me now is a deeper level of love, acceptance, respect and reverence for who I am as a woman and for everything that makes me uniquely me. None of this feels ego-driven or heady but has simply come from the passing years of living in this body and realising that fighting with myself will never make me whole. I feel grateful for the love that I have been able to create within myself.
This morning something really resonated with me. Turning 44 has made me look back and reflect on the last forty-three years of my life. I have run into quite a few bumps… but who hasn’t? I also have climbed over many mountains.
These obstacles that we face throughout life are what help us learn life lessons. Birthdays are a day to reflect back on how far we have come and the lessons we have learned along the way. In the last 43 years of my life, I have learned and grown into the woman I am today. So today, I thought I’d share with you a process (and 44 Life Lessons – in no particular order) I do around this day. The ‘process’ is what I call my ‘reflection and intention’ process. I take the time to reflect on the past year and set my intention and vision for the coming year.
First, I take the time to reflect on the past year. I ask myself:
- What did I allow myself to do?
- Who did I allow myself to be?
- What did I allow myself to enjoy?
Then I work on the intention piece of it:
- Who do I intend to be?
- What do I intend to do?
- What will I allow myself to enjoy this year?
And then I ask myself:
- What is the one gift that I want to gift myself this year? What am I going to allow myself to receive this year?
44 Life Lessons
- STARTING WITH A QUOTE (and my LIFE MANTRA): “Work on things people can’t take away from you… things like your character, personality, transparency, your entire being…“
- Spend time daily on your personal growth, growth is a beautiful thing. REMEMBER; The MAJOR key to your better future is YOU.
- Slow down and tune inwards, It’s OK to just be ♡
- Discover your core values and live by them
- Be clear on your ‘Why’
- I used to blame everything outside of me for my lack of progress until I found that my problem was inside.
- Have a daily journaling practice
- Practice Gratitude every day
- This is your life, your life only, and you’re in charge of it – do whatever you need to do to put your mark on it
- When in doubt, just listen to your intuition and take the next small step – Small steps lead to big changes
- Learn to differentiate between ‘want’ and ‘need’ – VERY IMPORTANT
- Be a curator of your life. Slowly cut things out until you’re left only with what you love, with what’s necessary, with what makes you happy. Simplify Your Life – Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, clutter weighs you down in many ways – The Art of Simple Living. Choose quality over quantity. READ: How I radically simplified my life in the last 18 months
- Save for things that matter, be mindful of where you spend your money – when in doubt, remember this; TIME IS NOT MONEY, TIME IS LIFE (think of the hours of your life you spent earning that money you are about to spend)
- Life is not just the passing of time. Life is the collection of experiences and their intensity.
- Practice Self-Love & Self-Care daily
- Make peace with your past, release and let it go
- Don’t compare your life to others. What other people think of you is none of your business – You can’t please everyone!
- Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger
- It’s never too late to be happy, but it’s all up to you and no one else. No one is in charge of your happiness but you. If you’re going to have a rule for happiness, make it this: ‘Nothing has to happen for me to feel good! I feel good because I’m alive! Life is a gift, and I revel in it.’
- When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer. Believe in yourself.
- Burn the gorgeous candles, use the nice sheets, and wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special – it’s all you’ve got! Don’t live your life waiting for tomorrow
- ANOTHER QUOTE: “The woman I was yesterday, introduced me to the woman I am today; which makes me very excited about meeting the woman I will become tomorrow.”
- Curate your Signature Style; Make-up, Scent, Hairstyle and Jewellery
- Overprepare, then go with the flow.
- Do at least one thing every day that brings you joy
- Time heals almost everything. Give Time time.
- Believe in miracles – Life itself is a Miracle
- Get outside every day – connect with Mother Nature
- It is necessary to cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.
- Nourish your mind, body and soul
- No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
- Eat like you love yourself
- Turn your home into your sanctuary
- Listen and take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live in.
- You have two choices: You can make a living, or you can design a life.
- Reset, Readjust, Restart, Refocus – As many times as you need to
- Check in with yourself – every day
- The process of transformation may not always be comfortable, but it’s meant to grow us and free us, moving us towards a new life
- Take chances, take a lot of them. Because honestly, no matter where you end up and with whom, it always ends up just the way it should be. Your mistakes make you who you are. You learn and grow with each choice you make. Everything is worth it. Say how you feel, always. Be you, and be okay with it
- There are always choices. Always
- Sometimes it’s the changes we never wanted that changes everything for the better… Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do. You have to fully understand and find peace with where you came from to get where you’re going. It’s never too late…or too early…to follow your dreams. Remember; Life stops for no one – neither should you
- Take life one day at a time because every day is a different day with new challenges. When we get too caught up in the busyness of the world we lose connection with one another and ourselves. Life has no limitations, except the ones you make
- Working towards Creating Your Ideal Lifestyle, not Retirement
- The best is yet to come…
Want to know a secret? It’s only since I entered my forties, I started having a deep connection to my birthday, it’s one of the most magical and reflective times of the year for me – it’s simply MY NEW YEAR!